F. I. N. E.

We live in a world where everyone is posting and tweeting the positive. Do it myself, and it is a good thing. Being positive brightens your day and lightens your heart. Reading affirmations, especially during an attack of the blues, can change your whole day. So what happens when they don't work? I suggest we cover up the clouds with the F. I. N. E. syndrome that each and every one of us use as a shield. You can be wallowing in the worst of the worst emotions and if someone asks "How are you?" the answer is usually fine. Can't let anyone know we are having a bad day or we are feeling down about something because face it, we all have something to be grateful for, right? Start with the big one, we woke up. Must be grateful.

What happens when you are grateful you woke up and you are in pain , or you just don't feel like being happy. Your choice. Happiness, like anything else in life is simply that, a choice. We may not say the words and then maybe some do. "Today, I choose to be happy, or sad or angry". Nothing wrong with that because it is your choice. So, why do we hide it? Can't burden my family and friends with my mood; they're happy so I have to be too. So I will hide behind that little 4 letter word. I am fine. I will slap on a smile, phony as hell, and tell the world everything is okay.

Many years ago, I learned to break those 4 letters into a little phrase (I apologize in advance for bruising your sensibilities) that goes something like this:

Fucked up
Insecure
Neurotic
Emotional

I suggest, that on any given day, one or all of those words have meaning in our lives and yet we hide behind a wall of daisies, thinking that we are all alone and the rest of the world is thrilled to be alive. Doesn't it say that on Facebook or Twitter? Stay Calm and Smile, Life is Good and my all time favorite Someone Else Has it Harder or Worse. I can guarantee you someone in this world, in your neighborhood for that matter, has it worse than you do. It doesn't change your circumstances.

This writing is the result of watching a video posted by my very good friend Dee Wishart.

 

Instructions For A Bad Day

 

I love that they use the word "inevitable". We all have them, each and every one of us, and we all deal with them in our own way, as we should. What is so wrong with someone just simply saying "I am having a bad day". If there is no one to hear those words, say them to the mirror, write them down or journal your feelings through whatever medium works for you. Call your best friend or simply get comfortable and feel...it really is okay. Cry, laugh, read, watch a sad movie or even a happy one. My whole point is...don't hide it. Don't stuff it down into the pit of your gut until you feel sick from storing all those emotions, just to fit in. Emotions are to be expressed, no matter what they look like and trust me when I say, everyone has every emotion. I remember telling a friend once that I didn't get angry and the truth of the matter was: I was always angry. It was so bottled up, that releasing it was frightening. Many years of training taught me that my anger was not acceptable behavior, I didn't deserve to be angry, I had no reason to be angry. So I, like so many of us, became F. I. N. E. It was safer to live in that pretend world of "all is well" and not rock that boat everyone talks about.

 

I hope you watch the film. It made a profound difference in my life. Have a great day my friends. Be open and honest with yourself and live in peace. You deserve it.